Quelle: How Idiots Pull Down Palm Trees: The Daily Nooner (EST)!
Donnerstag, 6. März 2008
Der geborene Holzfäller
Labels: Funny
Archiv ‘Funny’
Donnerstag, 6. März 2008
Neuer Chef-Kostümierer bei Hostpoint
Yvan Knapp wird beim Hosting-Unternehmen Hostpoint am 1. April seine Tätigkeit als CCO (Chief Costumer Officer) aufnehmen. […]
Quelle: Hostpoint holt Head of Webhosting von Swisscom
Die Einführung der neuen Corporate Identity (neudeutsch auch „Erscheinungsbild“ genannt), welches zufälligerweise auch mit der betriebsweiten Entdeckung des „Du“ einher geht hat Herrn Knapp wohl den Rest gegeben, weshalb er sich einer neuen Stelle zuwendet. Wenn der verheissungsvolle Stellenbeschrieb stimmt, wird er aber erst wieder an der Fasnacht 2009 richtig viel zu tun kriegen …
PS: Hostpoint ist meiner Meinung nach nicht zu retten, indem man neue, gutbezahlte Köpfe ins Boot holt. Das Geld hätte man besser in die Erweiterung der Server-Infrastruktur gesteckt und die Zahl der VirtualHosts pro Server verringert … Und so lädt meine Mediawiki-Installation weiterhin in gähnend langsamen 5 Sekunden pro Seite. Juhu!
Mittwoch, 5. März 2008
Sind das Neuigkeiten?!
Im aargauischen Kölliken hat heute Nacht in der Deponiehalle ein Fass mit Sondermüll gebrannt.
Quelle: Brand in der Sondermülldeponie
… und heute morgen soll in Schweden ein Elch gefurzt haben.
Samstag, 1. März 2008
Politiker: Dümmer als die Polizei erlaubt
Congratulations to the state of Georgia for electing this moron.
Quelle: Republican Makes Ass of Himself on MSNBC
Dienstag, 26. Februar 2008
Bilder zum Schmunzeln aus den USA
Monty Python im US-Präsidentschaftswahlkampf
Come back … ‚tis just a flesh wound … oh, all right, we’ll call it a draw [unentschieden]
Erläuterungen:
- HRC = Hillary Rodham Clinton
- Ritter der Kokosnuss
US-Präsidentschaftswahlkampf
Same shit, different asshole!
Zum Glück steht der nicht mehr zur Wahl …
Fernbedienungen
Auch Steve Jobs hat dies längst bemerkt …
Quelle: How Grandma Sees The Remote
Help, I signed her public key!
Quelle: Responsible Behavior
Tags: Zeitgeschehen
Labels: Funny
Dienstag, 26. Februar 2008
Fucked Fucking Fuck!
8×8×16 Cement Block – $1
I have approximately 275 to 300 cinder blocks for sale. They are standard 8″x8″x16″. They cost about $1.75 plus delivery fees if you buy them somewhere else. I’m asking $1.00 per block.
You pick them up and move them yourself.
Please don’t waste my fucking time with endless emails. These are plain old cinderblocks, for fuck sake. You don’t need to do an engineering study on the feasibility of using these fucking things as building material. That’s what they’re for, you fucking idiots. Now listen, we’re all busy people here. You want the blocks? Come get the fucking blocks and give me one dollar for every block you take. How fucking hard is that? You don’t have to tell me what you’re building. I don’t give a fuck. I’m not interested in helping you build it either. Why? Because I don’t give a fuck. I just want to get these fucking things off my property. So if you want them, get the fuck over here with some money and take them. The next fucking moron that emails me with “I’m building a blah blah blah, and was wondering if…” The answer is NO. Come get the fucking blocks and build it yourself. If I knew how to do masonry, don’t you think I’d be using the blocks myself instead of selling them for half fucking price? What the fuck is wrong with you people? The next one of you fucking jackasses that emails me with some sob-story bullshit is getting his email address added to the North American Man/Boy Love Association mailing list.
You want the blocks? Come get the blocks, and don’t fuck with me!
In Textmate habe ich folgende Regular Expression gebraucht, um die fucks fett zu markieren:
Search: (fuck+*) Replace: $1
Labels: Funny
Samstag, 23. Februar 2008
Das Arbeitsleben eines Papparazzis in LA
I quickly learned that celebrity pictures were worth far more than news pictures. The front page of the Times of London, for instance, would fetch $1,000, while a front page and a double-page spread in a glossy showbiz magazine could easily get you $10,000. […]
When I was covering Britney [Spears], I’d get to her house at midmorning — she is not an early riser. I’d park in one of the many gravel parking bays along Mulholland, away from the no-stopping zone near her home. The other paps would already be there, usually in blacked-out SUVs or Range Rovers. I’d sit and wait, making sure that no one was blocking my quick getaway and that my camera was close at hand.
Then, out of nowhere, Britney’s white convertible would speed past. It would be a mad dash to get near the front of the pack — although often you’d be 10 or more cars back, just relying on the the guy in the SUV in front of you, who in turn was following the guy in front of him. You’d drive so close that you’d keep one foot on the gas and the other covering the brake. Accidents were common.
Quelle: The snapper snapped
Das Leben als Britney Spears muss schon echt verschissen sein – da will man rasch in den Supermarkt eine Milch und eine Packung Kellogs kaufen gehen, und im Rückspiegel des Autos sieht man eine Kolonne SUVs, die einem auf Schritt und Tritt verfolgen … Kein Wunder wird man da Reif für die Klapse!
Tags: Los Angeles
Labels: Funny, Medien
Freitag, 22. Februar 2008
Weibliche Lebensziele
College really isn’t necessary.
Marriage is something that every girl look forward to during her childhood. I believe that every girl should marry every guy that is rich so girls can just go and get their nails done and take the kids shopping. I don’t think that college is necessary because you go to school twelve years out of your life and after that you should be done.
Men, I can understand if they want to go to school longer to get a better education to work on stuff they like to do. Every man should have money so he can support his family. Even if he doesn’t want to get married I think all boys should go to college. I don’t think girls should have to go to college. They are too busy with their life and family.
But I can understand if a girl want to go to beauty school, cause every girl should have options but personally I don’t think and get their nails done or go shopping. Have a great time. I’m not saying boys should have the life of work and distress because they are humans but they need to work if they want to have a good life because obviously their wives won’t be bringing home the money.
I guarantee that no girl will marry a pour guy cause every girl wants the life of a princess. When your husband gets home from work you can go out to eat with all the money he makes and also pay all the bills. Girls should all have back up plans but nothing that needs college to succeed. Maybe like a day care out of your home. So girls, have fun. Boys, start working!
Via: College really isn’t necessary
Scan: College really isn’t necessary
Korrigierter Scan: College really isn’t necessary
Tags: Frauen
Labels: Funny, Gesellschaft
Samstag, 16. Februar 2008
BMW auf Behindertenparkplatz
Gesehen am Freitag, 16. Februar 2008, im IKEA Lyssach.
Ein Kollege bemerkte süffisant:
Ob der wohl IV bezieht?
Labels: Funny
Freitag, 15. Februar 2008
Unterhalter für Anlässe
Eine Liste von Unterhaltern, die sich für Betriebsfeiern oder Vereinsanlässe eignen:
Moderate Preisklasse
- Marcel Reber, „Jules“ (Text), s. evtl. auch ScherzGrenze
- Marco Morelli (Text & Musik, BE)
- Benes Wohnzimmerband (Musik, BE)
- Zauberer Siderato (Magie & Text, BE)
- Martin Sumi (Text & Musik, BE)
Höhere Preisklasse
- Frölein Da Capo (Musik)
- Flügzüg (Text & Artistik, BE)
- Bagatello (Musik & Text, BE)
- Eliana Burki
- schön&gut
Auszuprobieren
- Les Papillons
- TAP — Theater am Puls (Impro Shows, BE)
- Duo Hinterletscht (Musik & Text, ZH)
- Edi Transformation Art (Magie & Text, BE)
- Mammutjäger
- „Fraktion Bunter Abend“; bestehend aus
Tags: Freizeit, Kunst, Künstler, Unterhaltung
Labels: Funny
